Tuesday, 11:04 A.M.
My RA likes this dude that, like, totally needs to bone him right now, except he’s not getting the message. So if this guy reads RIT Rings and realizes that he’s the guy we’re talking about, he needs to bone my RA right now. Thank you!

Sunday, 4:41 P.M.
Hey, calling a third time! Wanted to let you know the purpose of the second phone call was to say that it’s a beautiful day. I’m drunk off this beautiful day.

Monday, 9:22 P.M.
I just wanted to let you know that I take joy in a few things in life. Monday nights when heroes is on, Sushi Tuesday’s at Grace watson, and every Friday when a new issue of the Reporter comes out. Thanks for giving me something to look forward to.

Monday, 1:41 P.M.
There is construction going on outside my window and all I want to do is sleep. I realize that it’s, like, 2:00 in the afternoon, But i’m so tired. Make it stop.

Saturday, 9:48 P.M.
Hey Reporter, how come you told me that late night bingo was five dollars and then my friends went and it was really free? What’s the deal?

Saturday, 4:40 P.M.
I think it’s a beautiful [effin] day outside I really wish I had my camera. I mean seriously, I'm a photo major and I didn't bring my camera. Ok, so I thought it was going to be a [number 2] day outside, but it's a really beautiful day.

Saturday, 1:31 A.M.
Um, i forgot what i was going to say. But this is the sixth time i’ve called you tonight and you never answer your phone. it’s over between us.

Saturday, 1:27 A.M.
Yo RIT Rings, I love you so much. It is Friday night and I am loving life right now. Anyways, get back to me soon because I love you. Bye, Rings.

Saturday, 1:30 A.M.
Hey Rings, I call you so much and you call me so little. Makes me feel bad.

Saturday, 1:28 A.M.
I just came out of RITchies and there was a guy on a Segway from Public Safety, and he told somebody else to get off a bike. [WTF] is up with that. He’s on wheels anyway. Public Safety are such hypocrites.