Distorter

Issue PDF Greg Caggiano

RIT to Create Reckless Driving Lane by Ilsa Shaw Note: This story appeared in our April Fools Distorter issue and is for comedic value only. RIT students Jeremy Baetlow and Matt Lanciaux want a little more elbow... RIT Guy Finally Gets the Girl by Reporter Staff Note: This story appeared in our April Fools Distorter issue and is for comedic value only. In a bizarre turn of events, a male RIT student was spotted with an... Sports Desk: Beer Pong by Josh Lehrer Note: This story appeared in our April Fools Distorter issue and is for comedic value only. Bro! Can you re-rack that?

News

Campus Rebuilt with iBrick Technology

Note: This story appeared in our April Fools Distorter issue and is for comedic value only. RIT benefactor Tom Golisano has donated five million iBricks to the RIT...

Reporter No More

Note: This story appeared in our April Fools Distorter issue and is for comedic value only. As of April 1, 2008, Reporter will no longer be allowed publication on...

iPhone Hacker Hacks Sun

Note: This story appeared in our April Fools Distorter issue and is for comedic value only. Famed iPhone Hacker and RIT student George Hotz recently announced his...

RIT Forecast

Note: This story appeared in our April Fools Distorter issue and is for comedic value only. The Game Ritter Arena, 2:30 p.m. – 5:30 p.m. RIT’s The Game team...

Crime Watch

Note: This story appeared in our April Fools Distorter issue and is for comedic value only. Segway Theft – Quarter Mile An unidentified male student stole a Segway...

Leisure

The Bitch Is Back

Note: This story appeared in our April Fools Distorter issue and is for comedic value only. On 23 February 2008, RIT opened the Department of Complaint...

Our Sincerest Apologies

Note: This story appeared in our April Fools Distorter issue and is for comedic value only. The whole staff of the Distorter would like to apologize to ____. As...

RIT Questionnaire

Note: This story appeared in our April Fools Distorter issue and is for comedic value only. We asked twenty of our friends outside of Java Wally’s what they thought...

Features

That Toaster

Note: This story appeared in our April Fools Distorter issue and is for comedic value only. How would you describe yourself? I’m a toaster. What brought you to...

Views

RIT Rings

Note: This story appeared in our April Fools Distorter issue and is for comedic value only. Tuesday, 1:45 p.m. Hello, RIT Rings. Do you believe that by...

Editorial

Editor's Note: Web 3.0

Note: This story appeared in our April Fools Distorter issue and is for comedic value only. My friends, I have caught a glimpse of the future, a monumental vision...